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Fess Up(Again!)
Okay, guys, you didn't leave me out on a limb last time.
P.S. I feel better already...
by Marie
ORIGINAL MESSAGE:
Marie
DISCUSSION:
Okay, Marie, you asked for it! Well, for starters, Sophie likes to knock over your glass to steal the ice cubes out of it. Whenever she hears ice cubes jingling around in a glass she comes a'runnin'. My husband sticks half of the ice cube in his mouth and she jumps up on him and takes it directly from his mouth! She loves this little game! I know that ice cubes can be bad for her, but my husband is only home on the weekends, so she doesn't get them on a daily basis. When we are out in the car, all three of us share the same water bottle. Sometimes Sophie gets to drink directly from the bottle -- I won't drink out of it again once she does, but my husband will -- but most of the time she gets it poured into the cap for her to lick out! If we are eating ice cream, she gets to lick our spoons when we are done. The other day, she made us laugh so hard . . . my husband brought home a humongous banana split. It took us longer than usual to finish it and Sophie was patiently waiting to lick the spoons. Well, she got tired of waiting, got real mad, made a little "umph" noise as if to say, "Well then, I'll show you!" We looked at her and then she squatted and peed right in the middle of the dining room! Impatient little brat!! : - ))
And I know you wouldn't count the habit that everytime I dry my hair, Mikee comes slowly stretching and walking toward me to reach down and pick him up and hold him while I dry my hair under the hair dryer, only for about 30 minutes, that's all.
Then, there's the daily rituals that I "sneak" Mikee alone by himself into the computer room to hold and love while I use the computer...and alternately "sneak" Angel away to the computer room for her turn. That way, they each think they have my undivided, "I'm Mommie's favorite!", session with Mommie. Oh my, I forgot the weekly photo-shoot sessions! But that only happens after I create their original color-coordinated hairbows for each new session. But, that's normal, right? And, I guess as long as I'm confessing... I have to come clean with the pink dotted-swiss ruffled petti-panties (with the sanitary napkin inside) that Angel wore during her Heat cycle. People at work now walk on the other side of the office from me after they heard about that one! They all used to stop by and talk from time to time. I guess they just ran out of things to say! Come to think of it, they stopped coming by right after I shared with them that Mikee expects me to hold him while I make my morning coffee. A pretty neat juggling act!
But! I know I'm not the only one who has six 8 x 10 (that's with the mat, for crying out loud!) photos of their babies on the wall in their office. No, I have none of my husband or sons or any other family members. I must close, I still have lots more to share... but maybe on the next "Fess Up" session. Think about it; between our babies and this column, we are putting thousands of psychologists and counselers out of work! Love to all... thought ALL of your stories were a hoot! Rita, I wish I could have shared your story with my Mom (who also had a Maltese), but she'd have had to be wearing 'DEPENDS' before I told it. Smiley grwuff-grwuffs from Mikee and Angel, two very spoiled, very much loved, little warm fur babies from Texas. Which is my favorite? That's easy! Mikee AND Angel!
Shelley, the "leg licking" after a shower is a thing with my guys too. Recently, my husband handed me the portable phone as I stepped out of the shower mistakenly thinking it was an important call for which I had been waiting. Well, here I am, dripping wet, a dog licking each leg, talking to the manager of the local supermarket who was responding to a customer survey I had filled out about wanting to bag my own groceries! Marie P.S. And, OF COURSE we kiss on the lips. How else are you supposed kiss?
Carrie
Well........ok, only here and don't tell anyone else!! There are a few things, first, I kiss Taffy on the mouth sometimes, just quick ones, cause her tongue is pretty fast. When she stays up with me, I carry her while I go in and get a drink of water and she gets a drink out of my glass, then we turn out the lights and I carry her to our bed and cover her with her own blanket. When we go out to eat, Taffy has to go to. I always, always wrap one or two little bites of something in a napkin and put it in the side pocket of my purse. When we get to the car she KNOWS where it is, and we have a ritual we go thru.....she gets excited and sniffs in my purse....I get it out and unwrap....she sits...and I feed it to her, then I dab her mouth with the napkin. That's all I am going to tell about!! Great subject!!
Robin K.
This could really be embarrassing! But I guess the two "strangest" things I do for Lucy are these. First, I keep a wine glass filled with water for her on the nightstand so she doesn't have to get out of bed if she wants a drink. Little rascal will just sit and stare at the glass when she's thirsty until I hold it for her to drink from. And, when I have a bowl of cheerios, I always have two spoons--one for Lucy who loves to eat her cheerios off the spoon and lick the teeny bit of milk on it. So it's one bite for mom, two for Lucy. And oh my gosh, Marie, this is just the tip of the iceberg!! Can't wait to read these responses. What fun!!
cathy brown
Ok Marie...if you and everyone else promise not to tell. I do not want to be committed to an institution! I too hold chewy bones for my four. After all, I have hands and they don't. They actually bring them to me and paw my hand until I hold it for them. I sing to them every morning (I have a terrible voice). I make up songs just for fur- puppies. They love it (Grandkids loved it too until they got older and knew better!) Drives the hubby crazy. I wash their faces every morning before breakfast and after. Before bed I gather up each of their favorite bedtime toys and take them with me to give to them. They each have a favorite blanket to sleep on in OUR bed. One of our malts loves to lick my hubbys ankle. ( It is a compulsion.) She hops up on his lounge chair and paws at his trouser leg and sock top until her raises his pant leg and pulls his sock down. (He will kill me for telling this. A super white-hunter type, macho guy who talks baby talk to them and has pet names galore for each!)
Zee
Marie: I do so many things that it is hard to say, but here goes. (1)Shayna doesn't like to take her pills (Brewers Yeast and Dis-taste pills), so after she spits them out, one at a time I rub her neck and head until she gets them down. Every morning! (2)KoKo loves her ears rubbed so every morning before my eyes are opened she is in my face and I'm rubbing her ears. Can't say I'd do this for anyone else in the world. I may be back with more after I spend some time on this one. Nicknames were easier. Good job getting us thinking. Love you guys.
Shelley
Hmm! Crazy things that I would not tell anybody. Well, I talk to Lalita & Veba and pretend they are talking back to me by answering myself in a high pitched voice sometimes. They both cock there heads and look at me like I've gone completely 'bonkers', which I think I am, sometimes when I do it. I also sing impromptu songs telling them how beautiful and lovable they are Veba my cat runs over to me & rolls around on her belly and meows in accompaniment and Lalita,my fluffball, dances around licking us both and makes excited little noises. You are right Marie, our babies can makes us do the craziest things that we probally would not tell anyone because they would not understand. I am definitely owned By Lalita & Veba!
Opal/Lalitta/Veba
For me-it would have to be the way I talk to Noah when no one else is around. For example, "Would Mommy's wittle pwecious like a cookie?, you want Mommy to holdy?, etc. Noah answers me with "r-o-w, and r-oo-oo. He talks to me. I think we have our own way of communicating with each other.
April B.
Well, I do let Angel have a lick or two off of my ice cream cone. My husband thinks that is icky but it hasn't seemed to hurt me or Angel....we are both happy and healthy.
Sandee M.
Hi Marie, this should be another funny one. What I do is very similar to you - I hold Bailey's bone for her, especially when it gets short so that she can get every last drop and also at bedtime I give her a treat in OUR bed and then bring her a little cup of water, just in case she's thirsty. Its so hard not to spoil these babies - and anyway, its fun.
Robin D.
Marie - LOL, I also hold Phoebe's Nylabone when she is in my lap, otherwise it keeps falling into the floor! Well, she will assist with the holding and sometimes manages to keep it stationary, but there I sit holding this thing for my baby to gnaw on! I sit for hours in the floor, she wants to play and wants to be in my lap, so she runs back and forth and around and around and it's easier for me to sit in the floor with her because she is not allowed to jump onto the sofa or off of it - took me some doing to convince her of this but she has adapted and knows now that if I put her on the sofa with me that she has to stay in my lap. Anyway, now the floor time has been reduced, but there for a while I would sit on the floor for hours with her - my butt would go numb and my back would ache, but I was determined to have that togetherness!
Everyone knows I am crazy about my dog, they have grown accustomed to what appears to be me talking to myself in the kitchen, but it's Phoebe underfoot and I just babble nonsense to her!
Leslie R
Marie, you are getting us to tell you our deepest, darkest secrets! Ha! Well.........My Buster is so spoiled he has to be held like a baby over my shoulder when I am cooking dinner. And to top it all off when we are eating (which is in the living room) I have to hand feed him his food. Tell me that's not spoiling. :) He gets a treat everytime he goes outside to tinkle also. And the best of all he kisses me right smack in the mouth! What a lover boy!
Libby & Buster
WOW...what confessing...Buster does most everything mentioned! Now its not so bad anymore...He takes food right out of my mouth (when I let him), Drinks water out of my cup, sits on my lap when I am on the potty, I hold the chewy bones for him, etc..everything! Zee I also wipe his mouth after he drinks water or eats,,,ha!
Libby & Buster (2nd response)
Of course, Marie, I also hold Tim's bones, so he can better chew on them. Could take an hour or so ... At night Tim sleeps in our bed. In winter he likes to curl up close to us under the blanket. Sometimes he will pace the appartment and then return to our bed. But no, he is not just jumping into the bed: He sits on the floor, looking up and making noises that gradually increase, until I wake up, hold up my blanket. This is his sign to jump onto the bed. Spoiled, that little thing, isn't he? In the morning he decides at what time we should get up by licking our ears. We then "have" to wake up and start playing in bed. You should see my boyfriend who - if you had asked him a year ago - would not even have let a dog sleep in his bed.
Sonja
Well here it is ...In the morning when I get out of the shower Oliver comes running over and I say "Olie, give mommy a kiss and a hug and I have to pick him up and kiss him on the mouth and give him a great big hug...This is how we start the day!
Glorya
Marie: Here goes. Thank God no one knows who I am for sure. We have 3 little Maltese. Roxy, Dax and Gus. Dax is very obsessed with feet. My husband would kill me if he knew I was telling anyone this. She waits every nite for him to take his socks off. She is disappointed if he showers before she gets ahold of his feet. Roxy tries talking to us and will sneeze on command. Gus is our spoiled brat. My daughter says he doesn't have to listen cuz " he's our special little boy." All three do sleep in our bed, but Gus has to snuggle right up to me. They are just too easy to spoil. Thought I was tough enuf not to, cuz I used to have German Shepherds. Found out I am just a big push over for little white fur balls. Oh yes, they all know how to beg very well at the table.
Deb
It is so funny to read these responses. I thought I was the only one that did these crazy things. My Sophie also has me hold her chewy bone for her. Right now as I'm trying to type she is laying across my shoulder licking my neck. You just can't ignore her. My husband has never been crazy about having a dog but since we got Sophie he is a different person. He carries her around like a baby, talking baby talk to her. Our oldest son said he thinks some aliens came and took his real Dad away and left a different one.
Dorothy
Oh for crying out loud- I cant believe what nuts we all are! Thank goodness ! I'm not alone.. I hold bubbles on her back, with her head nestled in the crook of my elbow, cradled in my arms like you would hold a human infant.I rub her pudgy belly,talk sweet talk to her,etc..and she just swoons. Not to mention the fact that I'm constantly making up songs about her(and her big dog brother Sam the Lab..).My children are certain that I'm certifiably crazy..I talk to them in full sentences and know its time for me to go out of the confines of the house to see other humans when I start expecting responses in kind... I also run through our house each morning playing a kind of dog friendly impromptu tag-hide-n-go-seek- game with them and I highly encourage barking from all participants(me included!)during the 5 minute or so duration of this game. It gets everybodys energy level way up! I am going to stop right there..no more secrets! I cant believe I told you about our morning game! Thank heavens no one has come the door and heard the commotion that we make..They would probably think that something terrible was going on in there! Oh well, its probably only a matter of time before we get caught(my luck it'll be somebody important-like my husbands boss or one of the kids teachers!)
I'm guilty of all the above, kissing a dog on the mouth, YUK, but I do it to my little Tasha, kiss her on the top of the head and tell her "Mommy loves Tasha", she understands, and gives me ohhh so many kisses! Nothing I wouldn't do for my fluff ball. BTW, I'm getting the picture I took of her puppy cut, my daughter scanned it for me and then will e-mail it to me, then I have to figure out how to get it to the web site.
Dottie
Well, I can't think of anything that people who know me aren't surprised at! They all say when they die they want to come back as one of my dogs! I think sometimes I delight in sort of shocking *some* people and let them see me do things such as feed them off my fork from the table (after I'm finished). I love seeing their faces!
anne
Okay Marie, I'll fess up. I play a game I call Boo with my girls. We start in the kitchen. I'll say Boo and run and hide somewhere and yell Boo again and all three will come and look for me. When they find me I get on the floor with them and they all jump around me and give me kisses. It's really fun and we all get our exercise too! Also, I let my dog's give me kisses on the mouth. I only let them do this to me and my husband. When company comes over they are not allowed to give kisses on the mouth than, only to us. I also wipe their mouths after they eat and wipe their little wet beards after they drink water. We're also guilty of hand feeding our babies and letting them have table food while we eat. There are just soo-ooo many things we do this is just the tip of the iceburg. They are very spoiled and our families think we are nuts! But I know all of you understand. Great topic again!
Angel
Hello, well there are few things I feel that I do are pretty silly, but I still do them. Like everybody else, I kiss Sunny smack dab on the lips. I can't help it. Also, when I leave him at home when I go to work, I always leave the television on (always on Animal Planet channel) and we watch "Nature Nut" together every morning. And . . . at the beginning of the show I sing along with the Nature Nut song for him. My boyfriend is never there for this because he leaves before me. So he doesn't know how wierd I really am. Before I leave for work I have to leave Sunny with a treat. He knows now, when I have to leave him, he's getting a treat. Then I say, "bye my baby, mama loves you." Not only do I do this, but I also call him from work and talk to him through the answering machine, just to let him know I love him and that I'll see him at lunch time. That's pretty much it. Basically, I just feel bad for leaving him alone. So I do this, hoping it makes up for it. Thanks!!
Charlynn
Hi everyone! I loved reading your messages but didn't read any-thing even close to what I have done. I have 2 male maltese, one is 6 years & the other is 3. The 3 year old loves to go for walks, but the 6 year old just refuses to go. He just lays down on the cement walkway & will NOT move. He is a little heavy to carry for a long walk & rather than make him do anything he does not want to do, I would just leave him home while I walked the other one. I started thinking what to do since he does like being outside, he just won't walk. SO here is the CRAZY part -
everyone else thinks I am crazy!! Wonder what you people will think? I decided to buy a double baby stroller so they could both go for a stroll with me. I started looking in the catalogues, but oh my, the prices were around $120.00! It didn't take long to convince myself that I needed to buy the baby double stroller even if it was soo expensive & I didn't even have a real baby who could use it. One day before I was to go to the store to buy it, I rode by a yard sale & couldn't believe my eyes. There in front sat a double baby stroller! How much I asked?
$15 the gentleman said because the "seat belts" were broken (not sure if that is what they are called). Sold, I exclaimed, trying not to jump up & down with excitement about my great bargain.
And I don't care about the seat belts I told the man while loading it in my car. He just stared at me probably thinking what a rotten mother I was not wanting to have the straps to hold my babies in! So now that I have confessed my story, is there anyone out there who can top this one? Love you all!! Rita
Rita
I'm back and guilty, guilty, guilty, of all of the above. I didn't know kissing on the mouth was a bad thing. Shayna has the bionic tongue and more times than not it slips into my mouth when I kiss her. Do your babies like to come and lick your legs after you step out of the shower? Yesterday we had someone in the house so I had to close the door to take my shower and The Girls could not understand why. They sat right outside until I opened it and appeared again. I know they were put out about missing the licking session. I guess it takes a special kind of person to be owned by a Maltese.
Shelley
GREAT idea! Okay, I'll tell you the truth...I dance with Bailey and Buddy. I don't mean that I have them stand on their hind legs and "dance" for a treat, I mean that I dance with them! We waltz or do a jig around the living room and dining room! I hold Bailey (like a regular dance partner) and do a spin or two around the room until Buddy gets jealous, and then I let him "cut in" and I do another spin around the room with him! I have tried it with both of them at the same time, but that gets very confusing, because who should lead when there are three dance partners? By the way, their prefered music is Motown, Louis Armstrong, Aretha Franklin, Frank Sinatra, or the theme song to "Friends".
Wow, this is kind of pathetic...I have GOT to start dating again!
Ellyn
O.K. Marie, here goes, I enjoy making up my own language, usually when I pick up my Taffy to kiss her on her lips, I say first, oooteeeee-boooooteeee. I lift her up and put her in front of me, she almost sits on my shoulders with her feet, and body facing me, and kiss her belly. The funny thing about this is, I catch my oldest 21 yr. old daughter saying the same thing. Then, where ever she is, when I'm ready to give her love and kisses, I say to her osh-schata-boon-da, I don't know why, or where I got that from, but we love to kiss her on her belly, it's so soft. Sometimes I like to kiss and bite her teeth, sometimes tougue to tougue! We just love and squeeze her to death!
Margaret & Taffy
I'm so glad to be in such good company!!!
anne
Ok, I am back also! I can't top the baby stroller thing tho , but, Shelley? Taffy loves to lick my legs when I get out of the shower too. And if I take a bath she is right there, I dip my hands in the water then let her lick off all the water. We dance too and I make up "Taffy" songs. I am constantly talking to her. I tell you all, I love my kids, but nothing tops my baby Taffy!!
Robin K.
Dear Friends...I love ALL of you, but am GLAD I'm not weird like most of you seem to be. I don't do anything strange OR weird with my babies like I just read SOME of you do... unless.... unless... UNLESS you consider the original song I wrote and sing for Angel after she gets her weekly bath. After she's washed and dried, I carry her to my rocking chair and she lays with her face toward mine, with her body on my tummy, and I sing softly, "My little Angel, my little Angel, you're just as sweet as a puppy can be; My little Angel, My little Angel, you're mommie's baby and you always will be." (She's a month younger than Mikee.) I only sing it for about thirty minutes...you know, just enough time to make sure she's really dry and rested after such an ordeal.
Annette (Mikee & Angel)
I knew that I had alot in common with other maltese owners... but I had no idea I had this much in common. I also hold carrot bones for my boys to chew on. Every week we go to the pet store to get a new toy or bone. At night they BOTH have a glass of water to drink out of. If Bacci gets to hot he will look at the fan until I turn it on or turn it away from me to his part of the bed.We have a big water bed and for some reason I always end up pushed up against the side. Fergie and Bacci get the middle as well as my pillow. Me and my boyfriend have to share one pillow. and most of the time we are hot bacause Bacci has the fan. Fergie like to go to the bathroom with me and I read to him before bedtime. Bacci likes the hair on my boyfriends chin. He will lick it and then start to bite it. My boyfriend now has a little bald spot on his chin. When someone asked him about it he said that he had a scar there and hair will not grow, but we all know that Bacci is the reason. It's sonething aobut these little ones that make us all do things that we would not normally do. But I love them for it.
Yavonda, Fergie and Bacci
Oh my, what a bunch of bone holders out there! AND, I'm also surprised at the number of you who squealed on your husbands. In keeping with the spirit of things, as I glance behind me to check that MY husband isn't reading over my shoulder, here's my husband's secret... The animals love to accompany him into the bathroom in the morning. Baxter will climb into his underwear (yes, while they're around his ankles - and yes, they're clean - he just put them on). Rudy playfully tries to get at Baxter while Baxter hides his face in them. All this is going on while Edith, the cat, is on the back of the toilet pitty-patting on Dad's back. I have the most patient husband in the world. Nothing phases him.
Marie
Ok, here goes. Just got back from a show weekend, I shared a motel room with a friend maltese owner. At bed time there she was with her baby and me with mine, and we are each talking baby talk to our dogs. I couldn't help but laugh if anyone was to have over heard us they would have had to think we had babies in the room! We do most all of the above, but also Diva has the fastest tongue in the south, I go to kiss her and she gets it up my nose!
Mary P
O.K.- so I didn't fess all- Noah licks my legs too after I get out of the shower, I also hold his "gummy bone" for him to chew. And as long as we're talking about husbands, my husband lets Noah climb up in his lap and lick his ear. I don't know who enjoys it more, him or Noah. We have a rule that Noah cannot be fed from the table. The other day, we were eatng some chocolate cake, and Noah was lying beside my husband. All of a sudden, my husband said, "whoops," as he threw a piece of cake over his shoulder in Noah's direction.
April B.
I am glad to know that we are in good company here! I am guilty of much of the above, too, although I don't hold my babies bones(though they do get to chew them on the bed) and I don't give kisses on the mouth, but will get them on the nose. I hold Cuddles like a baby when she is fussy, and learn to do lots of things one handed! She eats on our coffee table to be away from the other 3, and Mikey eats on our table with his own place mat; Toby on our bed. I never go to the bathroom alone to shower or otherwise unless I sneak in there for privacy, and 3 of 4 like to lick my legs when I get out of the shower, too. I have been known to make up songs for them about how much Mommy loves them, and have been known to encourage potty habits the same way (Tinkle, Tinkle, little Theo...") (I am sure my neighbors think I am nuts!) We have been known to take the babies for a drive to get them out of the house when walks are not feasable, and just the other day, I made a special trip to the mall to buy Toby his own satin pillow case cover, since, after all, he is our satin-pillow puppy! Tried the wine glass, too, Cathy, but got one too small, but they always get their own ice water on trips! Had a Sonic once bring out a biscut for them! Oh-and just this weekend, I took two to go hunt Easter eggs, and am now on a mission to have their portraits done. What a wonderful life!
Beverly
I don't think I can ever top these so I'm not going to try!!(Even the doll clothes on Ellie don't hold a candle!) I haven't laughed so hard in a long time and I absolutely *choked* on Marie's story about the cat on the toilet and Baxter and Rudy in dad's underwear!!! What a HOOT!
anne
Okay... Mika does all of the above... even has her own stroller, front pack, and is getting a jogging stroller that can hook up to the bike. Spoiled??? No.. of coarse not. Her special kisses are when I stick my tongue out and wiggle it at her and yes... she licks it!! When we get a new dog catalog she gets to "pick" out one toy. Okay so maybe a few more if she's good. You should see our floors. Dog toys all over!! To top the shower licking Mika gets to come in the shower when she wants to. I have to leave the bathroom door open in case she gets lonely out there. Needless to say she loves her baths and wonders why I don't join her. When no body is looking she gets a bit of this and that off the table and will even sit up there on a chair and be fed from a spoon. I could go on forever. But, my side hurts from laughing at everyone else!!
Jackie and Mika
Okay, another "Fess up" story to share. I just got back from Petsmart and finished the girls Easter baskets. I bought three baskets at Pat Catan's with colored tissue paper. I filled each with: one bag of Pupperoni's, one box of milk bones, 2 carrot bones, 2 cheese bones, 2 squeak toys, 2 plush toys, one tube of doggie toothpaste, and 1 brush. I called my mother to tell her and she thinks I'm completely insane now! I don't think getting them Easter baskets is insane, and I know none of you will either! But I just felt I should share this with people I know understand my love for my girls. Happy Easter everyone!
Angel